My "Little Bit of Perfect" is not only one that I have managed on my own but I can honestly say it is the one that brings me great feelings of pride and joy. Not just happiness ... I'm talking joy ... deep in my soul, simple pleasure, feeling of peace ... joy.
Nothing could have surprised me more.
My "Little Bit of Perfect" began as a dream last year. I couldn't do much more than dreaming last summer. I had just a bit much on my proverbial plate between the moving and unpacking, the father who decided to break a shoulder, the merging of two pups who were both used to being not only the "only child" but the "alpha" of each of their homes ... not to mention working full time and learning to manage/maintain a household that had, essentially, doubled in size, not to mention responsibility. It was a busy summer ... a busy year. My normal had shifted and I was adjusting. I'm not saying that my normal is now stable or that I am fully adjusted, however, I CAN say that I'm no longer having that clashing crisis of trying to squeeze more hours into a basic 24 hour period. So it wasn't until this summer that I was determined to begin to turn my dreams into reality.
Nothing could have scared me more.
I am not known for my ability to grow things. I'm not even known for being able to keep grown things alive. I have, in years past, killed everything from orchids to philodendrons. Yet, I have somehow managed to keep 3 of the plants from Momma's funeral alive for a year and a half. My thoughts began to believe that perhaps my luck has changed. So, my dream began a war inside. There was my desire for a garden in my back yard and it was immense. Of course, that dream was matched by my fear that I would kill everything, that nothing would live, that all would wither, turn brown and die. My fear was huge. H.U.G.E! My dream of having a backyard garden ... a place for Dad to sit outside and relax in the fresh air ... a place to watch the birds and the butterflies ... a place to watch my two little white furrbabies run and play that is filled with splashes of color, bright and living ... a place for me to let my mind be still ... was contingent on my bringing life into the backyard and keeping it growing. That meant I had to overcome my fear. Obviously that required a lot of prayer. A. L.O.T.
Nothing could have made me more determined.
I had planned for a year. I had read articles, online and in magazines. I had poured over seed and plant catalogs. I had watched PBS programs over and over on container gardens, Oklahoma gardens, what to grow for butterflies, hummingbirds, regular birds, etc. I had sketched ideas of how to do it on the backs of envelopes, sheets of paper, on pages in my planner. I had driven my eldest girlie nuts with questions on dirt and plants. I had gone crazy with reading instructions and planning. I made lists. Good grief! Did I make lists. I took my normal process of cooking, of following a new recipe ... reading it till I committed it to memory ... detailing all the ingredients ... and transferred it to creating a garden. I made my Dad watch me plot with a mixture of pride and amusement at my continuous plots and ideas. (Oh, who am I kidding ... amusement doesn't cover it - he would outright laugh and shake his head at me.)
Nothing could have made me more prepared.
I made my first purchase. I bought two "pots" and a little red wagon ... both of which made Dad literally laugh out loud. My "pots" were two 35 gallon galvanized steel washtubs that reminded him of his childhood and bath time. The trip down memory lane was ... well ... memorable. And my wagon? Despite making everyone think I was having childhood flashbacks, I have to say it has been the Best. Purchase. EVER! Dad scoffed at first. Yet after the first time we were able to unload the weekly groceries from the car and get them all in the house (including cases of water) with one haul in the wagon trip, he became a little red wagon believer. I can honestly say that my garden would not have gotten half as far without my little red wagon. It has hauled pots, dirt, soil, and ... did I mention dirt? It has carried plants and baskets and, oh yeah, more dirt. It has moved from the cars in the front of the house, to the patio in the back of the house, gardening tools and shepherds hooks and, yet again, dirt. Most recently it has carried mulch ... and ... one last bag of dirt. It has saved my life and my back and ... more importantly ... it enabled Dad to contribute to my project as well, getting him outside and physically busy.
Nothing could have made me more excited.
The day I got my first plants, I freaked out. I wasn't ready! They had arrived and I didn't have enough dirt. Getting dirty was an issue I had to overcome. Not the physical part ... although that was gross in itself due to the fact that I opted to mainly use the organic raised bed soil and that is filled with worm casings and other natural composted things that I was essentially shoveling ... well ... YOU know what I'm saying. No, the dirty issue I had was just the actual basic obtaining of the stuff. I wanted organic, no chemicals. That was the first step to determine. I don't have a pick-up truck to enable me to buy in bulk. That was the second step. I knew that bagged soil would be more expensive but I did want to try to stay within my budget. That was step 3. As blessings would have it, I was able to stay mostly on budget due to a sale during the entire month of May that was made even better using my rewards card and then made awesome by the fact that I had reward certificates AND a birthday certificate that had not expired. Dad and I ended up making 4 trips, filling both trunks each time with bags of organic raised bed soil and potting soil, during the month (and one final run in June that made me wish I could have gotten it in May but, oh well) to get enough to fill my washtub pots, my raised beds, my oversize pots, my flower pots for the front entry and my hanging baskets. I had a lot of dirt. And a lot of plants.
Nothing could have made me more panicked.
I ordered many of my plants online. I wanted specific varieties and I didn't have time to drive around and find them. I was familiar with the national company and had researched specifically to get exactly what I wanted. Of course, I also had a picture in my head of this beautiful full grown plant arriving and instantly blooming/producing ... likely springing up from the moment I opened the box. Reality is never exactly as we picture it. In actuality, reality is ultimately better with time but that comes with hindsight. When I first opened the box, I took one look and then opened the paperwork to find out the specific return policy. This couldn't be right ... could it? Scraggly green with barely a leaf, let alone a bloom and ... where was the produce?? I ordered tomato plants? Where are the tomatoes? *sigh* I'm rather proud to say that rationality did return and I did read the instructions instead of the return policy. I discovered the words "all of our live plant orders receive special growing care from our nursery & growing partners to ensure healthy plants are packaged and shipped to each of our customers. We do ask that you allow each product the recommended growing time provided in our growing guides before considering a product unsatisfactory." ** So ... taking a deep breath, I read all of the instructions, read them again, read them once more, then ... gently unpacked the boxes and did what I was told. Specifically. I didn't waiver. I followed their "recipe" just as it was written. They said to give each plant two tablespoons of water, that is what they got. They said to give the plants "outside time" in the shade for just a few hours each day, that is what they got. They said to plant them so many inches deep, that is what I did. I did followed the instructions from the nursery company and then I followed the instructions that I had read online. I talked to them and encouraged them. I handled them gently when planting, I watered them carefully in the early morning so they could face the sun and the day without the worry of rot. I coaxed and cajoled them into living. I may or may not have named each one. And I did the same thing with the ones I bought locally. I have prayed over each and every one of them to live a life of beauty.
Did I mention, nothing could have surprised me more?
I ... Me! I am a gardener! I have a garden! It is alive and it is blooming. It is growing by leaps and bounds ... well, most of it. My daisy tub is having some issues but I think they are starting to come around. I have a gardening hat because my dad doesn't want me to get sunstroke. Sometimes I even remember to wear it. I have tools to dig and till and snip and prune. I have a hoe! (Yet another gift from Dad) I have a hose and two different sizes of watering cans. I have fertilizer specific and general, both organic. I have heaved every single 40 lb bag of organic soil and every 50 lb bag of potting soil, not to mention the mulch, which I learned weighs differently if you try to use it after it has been rained on versus waiting a few days with it in the sun to dry out. I have gotten filthy and ruined a pair of shoes which have now become my "garden shoes'. I have sunburned and I have tromped out in the rainy mud. I have prayed protection through the fierce storms we have experienced and I have moved and shoved pots to re-position them for better sun. If we haven't had rain, I get up 30 minutes earlier because that is how long it takes me to do a thorough gentle watering of everyone. I have spent hours delightfully working and further hours peacefully relaxing. I have despaired over my one little Bumble Bee tomato plant for it was very weak, beat-up and small upon arrival, coaxing it to grow and it has! delighting me with not only growing stronger but this week it finally produced those beautiful blooms that lead to actual tomatoes. I have had down and dirty, simple pleasure fun. My dream has taken it's first steps towards reality.
Nothing could have been more a Little Bit of Perfect.
**Note: This is an excerpt from the Burpee Guarantee.
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